Design Star has shed it's disguise and finally shows us it's true purpose: to pit straight male designers against gay male designers

All right, so gay is a reoccurring theme in my blogs, but I only hold up a mirror to the TV... it is TV that relies on people's sexuality to create interest where otherwise there would be none!

So Dan on Design star isn't overtly gay, fine, I'm one dimensional. Still this week's design star brought it down to Dan, Antonio, and dull woman #2 -guess who goes home. Correct, but I'll get there later. This week's challenge had the designers making over celebrity rooms. It's funny, I don't remember the exact wording, but they made a point of leaving the type of room generic, but it just as easily could have been "the designers make over the guest bedrooms of celebrities, except Kathy Griffin, she wants an office or something. Also, she's not a celebrity". But really, none of them were.

So to pick the celebrities -and they do this to choose a number of things on Design Star. It's been something that's troubled me before, but I already write 98,000 word blogs, I've got to leave some stuff out. So, to pick which designer gets which celebrity, the designers each stand behind a stool with a can of paint on it (you know, cus it's a design show) and they lift up their lids to determine who they get. Here's the thing that bothers me; every time they show this, the designers are just standing behind their paint cans. You never see them go over and select a paint can. So this leaves me with a strong feeling that they are only creating the illusion of this being a random selection. I'm pretty sure it's all planned out (I know, everyone reading this is saying "duh, Mike... moron". But you're the one talking out loud. I can't hear you, who's the moron now?!).

So the Celeb-Designer combos end up like this; Dull Woman #2 gets Kelly Kapowski from Saved by the Bell. Kelly wants an eco-friendly make-over for her room. There' s no sense in repeating myself, if you care about my thoughts on "eco-friendly makeovers" go here -It's about half way down. It's only like two sentences, but I'm really thrilled I get to reference one of my past blogs, I feel like this is a milestone for me. So Dull Woman makes the room all eco-friendly, and does her signature "One wall has a pattern that repeats vertically". Honestly, I thought it was kind of cool, but it's been done... by her... a few times. Also, too much grass wall-paper, and she didn't have enough time to hang her headboard.

Dan "I'm probably gay, but if I said I wasn't your response would be 'really?' as apposed to a sarcastic 'Yeah, I'm sure you're not'" -umm, I'll be honest, I was going for the First-name "kinda funny description of the person" Last-name thing, but the whole idea was shortsighted on my part, as I don't know his last name. Regardless, I think you get my point. Anyway, he got Brandon from 90210 -I think his character's name was Brandon, I didn't watch as much 90210 as I did Saved by the Bell in my formative years; It's Jason Priestly, whoever he was on 90210. So Dan got whoever Jason Priestly was on 90210 and his very pregnant and oddly accented wife -The girlfriend and I had a discussion about where her accent came from... the girlfriend was arguing "Britain, maybe Australia?" I was arguing "The land of make-believe". They wanted their guestroom made into a nursery with a "nautical, Cape Cod theme". So he painted it blue and hung abstract boat frames from the ceiling - naturally.

Finally Antonio got Kathy Griffin and all of her craziness. Apparently she has three employees. Yeah, and she said it pretty much exactly like that "I have three employees". Apparently it takes three people to manage the media circus that is Kathy Griffin's career. Furthermore, they work in her house. So Antonio made some desks and -according to Vern Yip- decorated like a hobbit (but seriously, these days, who isn't decorating like a hobbit?). Also, there was a metal cutout of America at the front of the room so that they could plot out her tour schedule -"You'll do a show in Topeka, then come home, then a week in Bakersfield!". Lastly, he had 6 clocks on her wall all in different time zones -No snarky comment, just tossing up that meatball for you.

So they all hosted their spaces, Antonio was great, Dull Woman #2 was decent, Dan was awful, how awful? If you've ever watched "More to Love" you've no doubt noticed the heavy-set British woman who comes in at the elimination ceremony, says something along the lines of "there are three rings left", then leaves. Dan could not do that job. That's how bad his hosting was.

So Dull Woman #2 got sent home. I think it was mainly due to the headboard, but I can't say for sure as my omnipotence is failing me today.


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