More to Love than depressing me

Odd night of TV watchin' last night. Watched the last half of More to Love and the first half of Top Chef. I think I'm going to leave Top Chef alone for now, we'll see if I break my streak of no weekend blogging to talk about it tomorrow.

Oh but fat women be cryin'!!! Nah, that's too far, that's hurtful. But seriously, this More to Love show is getting out of hand. Last night contained the mother of all trainwrecks. See -well, some context first. Here's the problem at the center of this show; the majority of these girls are not crazy enough to be on reality TV. Most of these girls are here, or appear to be here (maybe I'm a patsy) because of very low self esteem. I'm pretty convinced (again, maybe a patsy) that most of these girls really think this is their best odds of finding love (most of them are pretty young too). Add to this the Fatchelor (I can't believe I did it... but I did. I can't take credit for that name either, I don't know where I heard it, but I'm sure it's not my own) So the Fatchelor may or may not have incredibly low self esteem, but I assure you of this; never in his life has he had two, let alone twelve (or how ever many they started with) women fighting over him so right now he's feeling like a total stud, and that's a lot for a man to handle. Also Fatch (short for the Fatchelor... that is my own creation) Fatch loves the make-out. It's totally clear within 12 minutes of any episodes start that Fatch is aimin' for the make-out. So Fatch is saying whatever it takes to get some make-out, and the girls are eating it up. Where am I going with this? Well, it's this equation that has made this show ripe for trainwrecks... and I guarantee that we'll see plenty more over the next few episodes.
So the two -well, fantastic doesn't work, because I'm feeling a little dirty about all of this already. If I call it "fantastic" I'm going straight to hell. Umm... the two stand-out moments in this show were the following; One- There's a pair of reasonable -or relatively reasonable- women left on the show. Blonde one (we'll call her Shirley) Shirley gets told by crazy mixed-race girl (we'll call her Ali) Shirley gets told by Ali that she (Ali) "Has fallen in love with [Fatch]" and Shirley has a crisis because she's afraid that Fatch will reject her because these other girls love him, and she doesn't. Two things about this a) The statement puts into contrast how crazy the idea of people "falling in love" on TV is; and b) It points out the absurdity in a show that makes someone feel like the have to fall in love with someone in order to win... him... see, I'm feeling ridiculous even writing it.
The second stand out moment involves Ali also (she's all over this episode). Ali decides that it's time to tell him how she feels (eek). So she starts off by saying "I'm going to say the same phrase in 3 different languages". Ugh. Now we all know how cumbersome it can be to tell someone that you love them. The girlfriend could attest to my own issues in delivering that news (and I pray she won't)... but yikes! That poor girl! So she goes through them and the last one is Spanish, which he translates to "Ummm.... you are my love?" (brilliant). Then she breaks it down English style and tells him that she's "fallen in love with" him. What follows is exquisite in it's awkwardness... it's so horribly awkward that it's terrible, but at the same time part of me is saying "I may be watching the pinnacle of human achievement in awkward moments right now". Moral conflict, thy name is More to Love.
Needless to say, she gets sent home -along with someone else I don't remember- and she tells him again as she's leaving that she loves him -seriously, it was so awful, the stress from recounting the events is upsetting my stomach... awful- then she leaves (sobbing) and he runs out after her. His running after her threatened to be the straw that broke my proverbial "camel's back" but he actually had a bit of a moment of redemption where he told her that he thought she was a great person but that they weren't right for each-other. Of course she's bat-poop crazy, so she didn't get a word of it. End of episode.

Honestly, recounting this has got me down a little bit. I think if next week is like this week (and it threatens to be) I may just not write about this show anymore. Ugh.
But I don't want to leave you on a down note. Here's a little inspiration, this one gets the girlfriend fired up. Girlfriend be paintin'! (not really, just calling back to the beginning of the blog... it's a tool of the trade)